The Odelisk - 12

I couldn't help but laugh as the Swedish squirrel assault team dropped in on uncle Festus and his clones.

"Morons."

The squirrels made quick work of the clones, and would have done the same with my uncle had I not stopped them. "I need this one."

"He's the head guy. We've got to kill him."

I picked up the furry little bastard that said that by his tail and dangled him over the other cook pot. "He's my uncle."

"Wellllll, why didn't you say that before?"

Recess

Playtime. Back to our regularliy scheduled program after the break.

Sure you want to play with me. :-)

The Odelisk - 11

"Okay Festus, what the fuck is going on?"

"What makes you think there is anything going on?" Festus lumbered towards the doorway. "I have to go check on the dinner preparations, you're welcome to join me."

Fuck. Relatives. Couldn't pick your own, often hated the ones you ended up with. I could kill him, but that would make it harder to get answers.

Great.

"TONIGHT WE DINE ON SWE--"

"Those had better not be Swedish squirrels in that pot."

"TONIGHT WE DINE ON SWEESS SQUIRRELS!"

The Odelisk - 10

Festus! What possible fucking connection did my uncle have with Big Dog?

Or did he?

And why was I suddenly thinking about Indy? Not that I wouldn't mind a little of his whip action right now, but there had to be some other reason. If I could just figure out what it was...

The Odelisk - 9

I dashed out the back, pulling up short by a tree when one of the squirrels hailed me.

"We'll let you know when it's safe to return."

I stared at the furry creature for a moment. "Fine."

It was then I heard a sound that made my heart skip a beat. "No fucking way..."

"TONIGHT WE DINE IN HELL!"

What the fuck were they doing here?

The Odelisk - 8

Fuck me, the entire Swedish Squirrel population was hanging out in the villa.

I didn't think that Dodge would leave the Odelisk here, unguarded, but I was going to take a look around anyway.

Until one of the squirrels called me over.

"Good thing we were keeping an eye on you."

"You don't sound Swedish."

"Yeah, well you don't sound like a bat."

He had me there. "Whatever, I've got work to do." I straightened, and started to turn into the room.

"Scatter!" A squirrel by the window squeaked and, as I watched, the furry little fuckers disappeared in a flash.

Then I heard the key in the lock...

The Odelisk - 7

Dodge tipped his head at me, then strolled out of my sight. I struggled with the restraints for a while, knowing it was futile, but unwilling to accept defeat.

Just when I was ready to give it up, for the time being anyway, I heard a strange chatter.

Moments later members of the Swedish Olympic Squirrel Team leapt onto the bed and started gnawing on the bindings.

The Odelisk - 6

Fuck me!

I just knew that Dodge hadn't restrained me for the right reasons. Now all I had to do was get out of these things.

"Go ahead and try." Dodge leaned against the door jamb looking smug. "I had those made to my own specifications."

Well shit. That just might mean I was well and truly fucked.

The Odelisk - 5

I wasn't too surprised when he grabbed my arm and herded me back around the couch. I was totally taken off guard when he didn't follow through though. I figured he'd have me bent over, or on my back in no time. Instead, he just tightened his grip as his expression turned hard.

"I don't have the time to entertain you right now, but I'm not comfortable letting you run lose around here." He studied me for a moment, his teeth clenching, a muscle in his jaw jumping. "Guess you're just going to have to remain as my guest." His lips curved into a smile that didn't reach his eyes.

I glanced around, looking for a weapon, planning my escape.

Before I could implement anything he headbutted me, and the lights went out.